Bet You Wish You Had Me Back
by The Smoose
Summary: Men always want to be a woman's first love – women like to be a man's last romance.
1. Chapter 1

So, this was just gonna be one long fic, but I decided to fill it out a bit after this part, and so this became chapter one. Enjoy!

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><p><span>Chapter One<span>

"Tony! Oh my God, is that you?"

It had been nearly ten years since he'd heard that voice, but he remembered it like it was yesterday. Pepper Potts. They'd been high school sweethearts, and everyone, including themselves, thought they'd be together forever. But when Tony got accepted to MIT and she stayed behind in Cleveland, they just couldn't stay together, and agreed to part ways. As much as it hurt both of them, it was for the best, and over time the wounds healed, but they remained out of contact. It wouldn't be until years later, in some random coffee shop in LA, when he'd hear her voice again.

He span around when he heard his name called, a smile lighting up his face as soon as he saw who'd done it. She still looked as gorgeous as ever, hair like a sunset, that toothy grin he'd always loved, looking stunning in skinny jeans and a tank top. "Pepper? Oh man! Hi!" he stood up from the booth he was sitting in and grinned as she approached, pulling her into a bear hug and holding her at arm's length with his hands on her shoulders. "It's so good to see you! Sit down, how are you?"

Pepper did as he asked, sliding into the booth and putting the take out cup on the table next to his, crossing her arms on the surface. "I'm great! Look at you, all grown up and still handsome as ever." She said with a grin, and she wasn't wrong. The boyish fuzz that had been on his chin the last time she'd seen him had grown into a full goatee, his lean muscles had bumped up and filled out his tailored suit quite nicely. "What about you? What are you doing in LA?"

"I live here now." He replied, sipping his coffee to hide the blush that had formed at her words. "My…uh my fiancé wanted to come back to live nearer her folks."

Pepper nearly did a spit take, eyes widening at the news. "Fiancé?!" she asked, smiling broadly. "Wow, you really are all grown up, huh? Who is she? When's the wedding? What's she like?" All these questions came out in a rush, but although she was smiling, something inside her was struck a little. Tony, however, laughed at her quick-fire questions, leaning back in his seat.

"Uh, her name is Lisa, wedding is in…six months give or take, and she's great! She was my assistant for a few years, and then…something clicked, you know?" his eyes widened slightly and he laughed shyly. "Well, I guess you do know." He fiddled awkwardly with his cup and cleared his throat. "What about you? What has the last ten years had in store for Virginia Potts?"

Pepper glared at Tony, but softened it with a smile. "It might have been ten years, but I remember what I told you I'd do if you ever called me Virginia." She huffed. "But I've been good, I graduated summa cum laude, like a certain someone else if their mother is to be believed." She winked at him. "Yeah, I stayed back home for a while after school, got a job out here just before…before your parents passed." She paused for a moment before reaching across the table and covering one of his hands with her own. "I'm sorry I couldn't come to the funeral, Tony, I can't imagine how hard it must have been."

"Thanks." Tony mumbled back, squeezing her fingers. "It was tough, yeah. It took me a long time to get over it. Your Mom helped a lot though. I stayed home for a couple of months after the funeral, she brought me home cooked food, did my laundry…yeah your Mom's seen my underwear, is that weird?"

Pepper snorted with laughter at this, covering her mouth as she laughed. "Oh God, well it can't be any worse than the time she almost walked in on us."

Tony groaned at this and brought his hands up to his face, laughing too. "Damn it, Potts, don't bring stuff like that up!" he looked back at her, eyes shining. "I yanked up my zipper so quick I nearly cut off my junk." He shook his head and sighed. "I missed you, you know. I missed this. I wish we could have stayed in contact more."

"I know what you mean." Pepper said softly. "Kinda felt like I lost a limb for a while there. But I think we did well out of it. And hey! You've met your Disney Princess, so it's not so bad." She gave him a wink and then caught a look at the watch on her wrist. "Damn, I gotta go, work stuff." She pulled a face and stood up. "But hey, if it's not too awkward, maybe we could do lunch or something? I wanna meet the woman that's taking away my fall-back option."

"That sounds great!" Tony agreed, standing up as well. "I'll talk it over with Lisa. Give me your number and we'll arrange a date and time."

After they'd exchanged contact information and another Tony Stark Bear Hug, Pepper was on her way back to the office, and Tony finished his coffee and made his way home. Neither would admit that they fell asleep thinking about the other.

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><p>The weeks flew by, and for Tony and Pepper it was like the last ten years hadn't happened. They were like peas in a pod once again, and luckily Lisa was absolutely fine with their friendship blossoming once again, and had even invited Pepper to the wedding, knowing that as close as they'd been, they didn't want to lose one another again. They all hung out together, Pepper bringing the occasional date along, but nothing that lasted. Part of Tony felt sorry for her, a little guilty that he was flaunting his happiness around her, but a smaller, more selfish part was glad that she wasn't about to get married any time soon, which he admitted was ridiculous…but he couldn't help it. You never forget your first love, especially if you meet up again with them ten years later and are desperately trying to hide…no, he wasn't going to go there. He was about to be a happily married man, he'd planned a future for himself and Lisa, nothing was going to distract him from that. Besides, whatever he was feeling was one sided. And didn't exist. Obviously.<p>

As the wedding drew ever closer, Lisa spent a lot of time travelling back and forth to the location they'd arranged, making sure all the plans were going smoothly, and on one such occasion she was going to be gone for a full week, and Tony had arranged to spend an afternoon with Pepper going through a box of her old high school stuff, some of which included him. He'd called to say he was on his way, but she wasn't answering. This didn't faze him though, he knew she liked to listen to loud music when she was cleaning so he assumed that's what she was doing. But he was wrong.

He made his way up to Pepper's apartment, jogging up the steps from the parking lot and as had been their customer over the last few months, he let himself in…and immediately wished that he hadn't because Pepper was on her hands and knees on the couch, with a man right behind her, having sex quite loudly. Tony froze, stared for a second until Pepper caught sight of him, and then he promptly turned around and closed the door again, a panicked expression on his face. It was one of those 'you can't unsee it' things and Tony wished he could burn out his retinas. He hovered outside of the front door for a few minutes before it opened again and a surly man walked out, clearly put out that he'd been interrupted, followed by a red-faced Pepper who was shooting Tony an apologetic look, tying the sash on her robe.

"I am so sorry." She whined and she dragged Tony back through the door. "I completely forgot we were supposed to hang out."

"S'fine." Tony mumbled, looking over his shoulder at the man walking away. "Wait, was that…was that Kyle Willis?!" he asked. "It was! I fucking hated that guy, are you kidding?" he turned back to Pepper who was now laughing, Tony quickly joining her. "He was an ass in high school."

"He grew up." Pepper defended before rolling her eyes. "Okay, maybe he didn't grow up mentally, but he's a great lay-"

"Okay, way too much information." Tony said, wincing and holding his hands up. "I've already seen the show, I don't need the commentary."

Pepper laughed again at this and led him into the lounge, allowing him to take the armchair while she took the couch after getting them both a glass of wine. "Alright, so glossing over the whole Kyle Willis thing…memories!" she pulled a shoebox from underneath the coffee table and placed it on top, taking the lid off and pushing it towards him. "I had a look through some stuff this morning, that's the 'Box of Us'" she smirked at him and pulled her legs up under her as he reached forward and took the box.

"Ho-ly crap." Tony chuckled, putting his glass down and routing through the box, picking up bits and pieces before gasping excitedly and holding up a cassette tape like it was the Holy Grail. "The Tony Stark Tape of Love." He mumbled. "I can't believe that you kept this crap."

"It's not crap!" Pepper scoffed, snatching the tape off him and standing up. "This was probably the most romantic thing you ever gave me. And yes, before you ask, hickeys are not romantic. Nothing is romantic when you have to explain it to your mother." She smirked at him and bent slightly to open a cupboard below the TV unit, revealing an old style stereo system that still had a cassette player in it. "I knew keeping this thing would come in useful…oh yeah, the smooth sounds of Phil Collins." She pressed play and 'Groovy Kind of Love' started strumming through the speakers. Tony was holding his head in his hands in embarrassment which made Pepper laugh and haul him up to his feet. "Come on, dance with me, Show me those old Stark dance moves."

Tony begrudgingly got up and sighed heavily, smirking as he took her hand and they started dancing slowly around the coffee table. "I was such a loser. What did you ever see in me?" he asked with a laugh.

Pepper tilted her head to one side and thought for a moment before shrugging. "You were a good lay."

"Oh yeah?" Tony barked out another laugh. "What, was that it?" he paused for a second before asking his next question. "Better than Willis?"

Pepper's mouth dropped open and she shook her head in amusement. "He's…he gets the job done." She said, slapping Tony's arm when he wouldn't stop smirking. "I'm not answering that question!"

"I'm gonna take that one as a yes." He said smugly. "I still can't believe you're fucking Kyle Willis."

Pepper laughed out loud. "What, are you jealous?" she teased, raising an eyebrow at him. "High school was a long time ago, he's different now." He wasn't really, but she wasn't going to give Tony the satisfaction of knowing that.

"Of course not." Tony snorted, twirling Pepper around and bringing her back to his chest. "But I mean…why go from steak to hamburger?" he laughed with Pepper before clearing his throat. "How often does he come round anyway?"

She raised an eyebrow at his question. "Once a week, maybe. Sometimes more if the need arises." She said nonchalantly.

Tony nodded and twirled her again as the song changed to 'Is This Love'. "And do you guys date, or is it just the boning?"

Pepper snorted and shook her head. "It's just this. I'm not really the relationship type anymore."

Raising an eyebrow, Tony nodded and they were silent for a moment before he asked his next question. "Is his dick bigger than mine? From what I saw, didn't look like he was hitting the same spots I could."

Pepper's mouth went dry and she swallowed, shaking her head slowly as they nearly stopped dancing, merely swaying from side to side. "No, to both." She mumbled.

Tony's heart was pounding hard in his chest and he took a deep breath, his senses quickly surrounded by her. "Does he make you come as hard as I did?" he asked, voice barely above a whisper.

Pepper's fingers tightened on Tony's shoulder and she squeezed his hand, swallowing hard. She shook her head, cheeks flushed as she gazed up at him.

They stopped dancing, just looking into each other's eyes as the music kept playing. Pepper let go of Tony and looked away first, clearing her throat and turning with the intention of turning off the stereo, but Tony grabbed her arm, tugged her towards him and claimed her lips in a fierce kiss. Pepper squeaked initially but quickly wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed back. It was wrong, they both knew it, he was getting married! But it felt too good to stop. Tony's hands slid down Pepper's hips to her ass, tugging her closer and eventually lifting her up against him, stepping forwards and pressing her against the closed TV unit. Pepper circled her legs around his waist automatically, groaning softly and tangling her fingers in his hair as she kissed him. It felt like they were eighteen again, exploring each other for the first time. They both started hastily undressing each other as much as was needed, Pepper slipping Tony's belt from the loops while he practically ripped her robe open and slid his hands along her naked body. Once Tony's jeans where undone and his boxers pushed down, he slid his aching arousal against her centre and slid home in one thrust, rocking against her before starting to thrust. Pepper couldn't help but gasp and moan loudly as he slid deep inside her, filling her and stretching her more than anyone ever had. How could she have thought she was satisfied with Kyle or anyone else? She arched against him with a hard rock of her hips in return, groaning his name. Tony moaned with relief as he slid home, moving with slow, hard thrusts and moving his lips down to her neck, kissing and sucking at the skin there and panting.

"Oh, fuck…" Pepper groaned quietly, trying to get as close as possible to him, already on the edge of release seeing as Tony had interrupted before. Tony grunted and slammed his hips into her, feeling her tighten around him. He bit down on her neck hard and sucked, leaving a hickey and grinding against her. Pepper moaned louder, panting and curling her fingers into his back as he slammed into her, making the unit rock loudly against the wall. "God, yes, fuck me. Don't stop, Tony."

Tony was racing towards release fast and he brought his head up to kiss her hard, at the same time sliding his hand down to brush against her clit, moaning her name into her mouth. He immediately felt her tighten around him as she shuddered with release, and he was gone seconds after her, huffing out breaths and leaning heavily against her. He closed his eyes, rocking his hips as he wound down and the panic set in. He'd cheated on his fiancé. He'd fucked his ex. He clenched his jaw in anguish and pulled away slightly, slipping free from her and quickly pulling up his jeans.

Pepper found her feet, leaning against the unit as she tied her robe again, breathing heavily and watching Tony panic. She stepped towards him, placing a hand on his shoulder which he shrugged off quickly. "Tony." She softly called his name but he was already stepping towards the front door, slamming it behind him. Pepper groaned and slumped down onto the couch, covering her face with her hands. She was an idiot, how could she have let this happen?


	2. Chapter 2

So…I just realised in the last chapter I had Tony and Pepper originally from Cleveland when I actually meant Connecticut (where Pepper is originally from) but I'm just gonna leave it as it is because Connecticut is hard to type quickly. Yes, it's that easy for me to make decisions. Also I want to thank everyone for their kind words and welcoming me back! I'm still finding my way through the Pepperony 100 (we must be on like 500 by now) and I'm probably gonna be doing that and turning my RP's into fics.

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><p>It goes without saying that Tony and Pepper didn't see each other for a while after their encounter. Tony was confused about his feelings; he loved Lisa, he wanted to marry her…but he couldn't get Pepper out of his head. He kept finding himself fighting the urge to go and see her. He felt like a junkie, hiding it from his fiancé and twitching at the mere thought of his ex. If Lisa noticed, she never mentioned it. He'd told her that he and Pepper had agreed she wouldn't come to the wedding, that they'd realised it would be a little awkward and they were taking some time apart so they could conserve their friendship. It was all bullshit. The wedding was two months away and if asked honestly, Tony couldn't say for sure he was looking forward to it, and it was entirely his fault.<p>

Pepper, on the other hand, was frantic. She was riddled with guilt, of course, but she wanted to see him again, if only to work out what the hell had happened. She felt a little bit used, but she knew he hadn't come round with the intention of screwing her into the wall. She'd entertained the notion of calling him, but something told her that he needed just as much time to figure this out as she did, and she'd also put money on him having told Lisa some excuse about them spending time apart. Which was why when she came home from the grocery store about a week after their encounter and found him leaning against her apartment door, she was surprised. As she walked up the staircase from the parking lot, Tony spotted her and started walking towards her, but she shook her head and brushed past him.

"Not here, Tony, come inside." She hissed, unlocking the door and dumping her grocery bags in the kitchen. Tony followed her inside and closed the door, pacing in the lounge until she finished, arms folded across his chest. "Okay, bring it on."

Tony promptly stopped pacing and glowered at her. "Bring it on?" he repeated. "Bring it on? Are you kidding?"

"Oh, don't start." Pepper snapped, not wanting to deal with Tony throwing a tantrum. "I know exactly why you're here, don't try shoving the blame onto me."

"That's not why I'm here at all." He barked back. "I came to try and fix this before it got any worse. We fucked up, we _both_ fucked up, but we have to try and move past it or it's gonna hang over both of us forever."

Pepper let out a snort and raised an eyebrow. "God, Tony, when did you get all holier than thou?" she asked, laughing. "Did you seriously think I was under the illusion that we were going to have a full blown affair? Get a grip!"

"Do you think this is easy for me?!" Tony bellowed, breathing heavily. "This is not how any of this was supposed to go. This…this is wrong, okay? We should still be together."

This wasn't what Pepper had expected to hear at all. She blinked and then frowned, giving Tony a confused look. "What the hell are you talking about? We agreed to break up all those years ago, it was the best thing for both of us."

"Bullshit." He growled, stepping forwards. "I agreed to what you wanted back then because I wanted you to be happy. I would have done the long distance thing. Hell, I would have stayed in Ohio if it meant I could have kept you. But you wanted to split up, and I get it, but you ripped me apart ten years ago, and the other night…"

"The other night was a mistake." Pepper interrupted, desperately trying to end the conversation all together. She couldn't understand where this was coming from, she had no idea that Tony still felt this way, and she sure as hell didn't want to deal with it. "It was…it was a mistake, a fluke. It meant nothing."

"Don't you dare." Tony seethed, teeth and fists clenched. "Don't you even attempt to toss this away. You have been my one and constant thought for the last decade, and I've been trying to replace the feeling ever since. You want to hate me? Fine. You want to ignore this ever happened, go ahead, but don't insult me, don't insult us, by saying it meant nothing." He spat his final words before turning and walking out of the door, slamming it shut behind him.

Pepper stared at the spot he'd just vacated, clenching her jaw and rubbing at her eyes briefly. Her mind was running at a hundred miles an hour, and she was having a hard time processing what he'd just said. Did he still love her? How could he, he was in love with someone else and he was going to marry her. No, he was just trying to deal with the pent up emotion from the other night, they both were. But it still hit a nerve, and she found herself wiping away a few stray tears as she made her way back into the kitchen to unpack the groceries. She didn't get very far though, because just as she turned around she heard the door open and close again, and then strong arms encircling her. She turned and found Tony, eyes red, standing in front of her, and she couldn't help herself. They met half way, mouths crashing together in a fierce kiss. Pepper's arms quickly circled around Tony's neck and she whimpered against his lips as one of his hands delved into her hair. After several moments they parted and Tony pulled Pepper in to a hug, burying his face into her neck and breathing heavily.

"I know I fucked up." He mumbled. "We both did, but this can't be it. It just can't be, Pepper." He pulled back and stared into her eyes. "I need you. Bumping in to you that day a few weeks ago…you have no idea how it felt."

"I know, Tony." Pepper said, tears still falling. "But this, us…it's wrong. You're cheating on your fiancé."

Tony closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers. "I know, I know that." He hissed. "But I need you. You're a part of me I thought I'd lost, and I can't let you slip through my fingers again."

Pepper sighed heavily and shook her head, closing her eyes and hugging Tony again. She didn't know what to do. Well, she knew what she wanted to do, but it was wrong, it was so wrong, and she'd hate to be in the opposite position. She didn't want to be the 'other woman'. But she also didn't want to lose Tony again, and with them it was all or nothing. She raised her head to look up at him, stroking his cheeks with her thumbs before she leaned in to kiss him softly, giving him her answer without words. Tony responded immediately, opening his mouth to her and sighing, relieved that she wasn't turfing him out of her life. Pepper curled her fists into the fabric of Tony's shirt and started walking backwards down the hall, leading him into her bedroom.

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><p>Things got a little easier after that. Tony continued to plan his wedding with Lisa, but he spent as much time with Pepper as he could, explaining that they were now working harder at their friendship. Pepper joined them for dinner now and again, bringing dates along as usual to throw of the scent, and they both knew it was sordid and disgusting, but when they were together, either hanging out, making love, whatever, it just felt so right. They were both kidding themselves but they couldn't stop, and although she was sure that it was tough on Tony, Pepper felt more and more used every time he got up and left her to go home, and she hated it.<p>

Tony wasn't fairing much better. Every time Lisa asked him about the wedding, even just stupid questions like did he like those flowers for the centre piece, he got a weight in his stomach, the same weight he felt when he thought about breaking it off with Pepper. He was between a rock and a hard place, they both were. Luckily, they both had their stag and hen nights coming up; Lisa was flying out with her Mom and 'the girls' to Vegas for the weekend, and Tony had arranged reservations for him and a couple of buddies at the penthouse at Chateau Marmont, where they'd go to dinner, do a little horse racing, and maybe tour a few clubs. He went with Lisa to the airport to see her off, and then made his way to the hotel. He pulled out his phone as he drove and dialled, pressing it to his ear and smiling when it was answered.

"You nearly here?" a female voice asked. Tony grinned and nodded to himself.

"Just left the airport, be there in ten." He sighed softly, feeling better just from talking to Pepper. "How's the room?"

Pepper laughed down the phone, leaning back against the bed and appraising the suite. "Big." She finally answered. "I can't believe you paid for this with the intention of not even using it."

"Well, it's gonna get plenty of use now, hmm?" Tony purred seductively. Pepper laughed again and it was like music to Tony's ears. "Okay, I'm nearly there. How about you run us a bath?"

Tony pulled up to the hotel shortly afterwards and headed up to the suite. He'd set the plan in motion that morning, calling his buddies and cancelling their night out, meaning that he could spend the weekend uninterrupted with Pepper. The elevator quickly took him up to the top floor and he knocked on the only door on that floor, grinning like a Cheshire cat when Pepper opened it in nothing but a robe.

"Room service?" Tony asked, stepping slowly into the room as Pepper backed up. "One hot hunk of man, ready to be served."

Pepper snorted and allowed Tony to wrap his arms around her as he kicked the door shut. "That was awful." She giggled, kissing him softly and humming against his mouth. "I've got half a mind to send you back to the kitchen."

"Oh yeah?" Tony mumbled, slowly untying her robe and spreading it open. "But then you'll have to entertain yourself in that huge bath."

"Eh, it's got jets." Pepper shrugged, smirking and unbuttoning his shirt, kissing him feverishly again. "Mmm, but I was thinking maybe we get a little more dirty before we clean up."

"I think that you have the best ideas." Tony said between kisses, lifting Pepper up against him as he started walking towards the bed, now down to just his jeans which were dangling open thanks to Pepper's swift fingers. "Fuck, I missed you, Potts."

"I can tell." She giggled, sliding a hand between them and squeezing him through his boxers, enjoying the squeak she got for her efforts. "That all for me?"

Tony grunted and trailed his lips down along her neck, nodding and doing a little squeezing of his own, his hands having moved to her ass. "All for you." He hissed, kneeling on the bed and laying over her. Pepper whimpered and arched up into him, sliding her hands into his hair to hold his head against her neck.

"Tony, get naked. Now." She huffed, writhing impatiently. Tony did as he was bid, quickly shucking off his boxer-briefs and settling between her legs. Pepper nuzzled against him and kissed him again, her nails lightly scratching at his shoulders as he pushed slowly into her, eliciting a moan of pleasure from the both of them. Laying flush against her, Tony rolled his hips, sliding a hand underneath her ass to lift her hips into his thrusts.

"Pepper…God…" Tony moaned, burying his face in the crook of her neck and biting softly, sucking the soft, silky skin of her neck and speeding up his thrusts a little. Pepper moaned again and Tony's hand shot out to cover hers on the mattress, squeezing her fingers gently.

They made love for what felt like hours, only making it to the bath once they were too worn out to continue, and while every moment they spent together was precious and wonderful, Pepper couldn't help but let the anxiety creep in. As she laid against Tony's chest in the bath tub, she played with the hairs on the arm he had wrapped around her, silent in her thoughts.

"I can practically hear the cogs turning." Tony mumbled behind her, kissing her cheek softly. "What's wrong?"

Pepper chewed on her lip and shook her head, taking a few seconds to clear her head before smiling and turning to look at him. "Nothing, I just don't want it to end, that's all."

Tony didn't know how to respond to that, apart from to kiss her softly and hug her closer. He would have promised her the world, but they both knew it wasn't his to offer.


	3. Chapter 3

Totally meant to upload this last night, stayed up til 3am writing it...and then fell asleep. But here's the final chapter, enjoy! And Happy Thanksgiving to all who had it!

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><p>Pepper woke up to the feeling of someone brushing their fingers over her naked back, and while it was a pleasant feeling, she groaned softly at being woken up at all.<p>

"Quit it." She mumbled, stretching softly as the owner of the hand laughed softly.

"Still ticklish." Tony mumbled, doing it again and grinning when Pepper opened her eyes, albeit to glare at him. "Don't gimme that look, I want to spend as much time with you as I can, and that means you gotta wake up."

Pepper sighed and yawned widely, rubbing a hand over her face. "What time is it?" she asked, voice still rough with sleep.

"Time stopped. I had a chat with the dude in control of time and told him to take a day." Tony snuggled back down under the covers and wrapped his arm around Pepper, kissing her slowly and closing his eyes. "Time stopped and we can just stay here forever."

"I wish." Pepper whispered, resting her forehead against Tony's and raising a hand to his cheek. "But we've got the rest of the weekend, all alone, in this huge bed." She smirked and kissed Tony again as he opened his eyes. She'd just slid a leg over his hip, rolling on top of him when his phone rang.

"If it's important, they'll call back." Tony mumbled against Pepper's lips, sliding his hands along her hips and grinding against her. Eventually the phone rang off, but only to start right back up again. Pepper groaned in frustration, sliding off of Tony and flopping onto her back while he got up to grab his phone. "It's Lisa." He said after a moment, shooting Pepper an apologetic look before answering and heading into the en suite. "Hey babe, how's Vegas?"

Just that simple line had Pepper's heart cracking more than it already had, and the rest of the conversation she overheard was torture. Listening to Tony making up activities from the previous night out he was supposed to have had with his friends, talking about how close the wedding was, how much he said he was looking forward to it, how much he loved her…her resolve snapped. She couldn't do this, she couldn't put herself through this anymore. She took a steadying breath and quickly got up, finding her clothes and overnight bag, hastily dressing and shoving things back into it. She heard Tony finishing up the conversation and tried to pack faster, anything to not have to talk to him about why she was leaving, but she heard the tell-tale sound of the bathroom door opening again and she looked up to see him standing on the opposite side of the bed, looking perplexed.

"Going somewhere?" he asked, his tone somewhere between amusement and confusion.

"Do you still love her?" Pepper asked him, straightening up and looking him in the eye.

Tony frowned. "What? What do you mean?" he retorted, as if she'd just asked him the answer to the meaning of life.

"I heard you on the phone, Tony." Pepper spat, voice wavering slightly as her emotions caught up with her. "How much you're looking forward to being married to her, and meanwhile you're here with me. So, do you still love her?" she asked, not sure how to take whatever answer he gave. Tony nodded slowly, swallowing hard. Pepper sniffed, wiped her eyes and looked back at him. "Do you…do you love me?"

Tony stared at her, his jaw tensed as he gathered his courage and nodded again. "Yeah, yes. I never stopped."

Pepper let out a soft sob and shook her head, a shaking hand coming up to her mouth to try and plug up the breakdown that was threatening as she gazed at him. "That just makes it worse." She cried. "Tony…I'm scared to lose you again, and you're not even mine." She turned away from him for a moment, thinking things over while Tony stood where he was like a little boy being told off.

"I don't know what you want me to say." He mumbled, eyes downcast, knowing he was fighting a losing battle.

"I can't do this anymore. It's too much, I can't live this life being the other woman." She turned back to him and placed her hands on his shoulders, then on his cheeks before leaning in and kissing him softly. "I love you, but that's not enough." She whispered, then turned and grabbed her bag, walking out of the room, leaving Tony standing in the same spot, trying to work out what he was supposed to do now.

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><p>Tony ended up staying in the hotel for the rest of the weekend, mostly getting drunk, almost calling Lisa and breaking it off, but he was too much of a chicken to do it, and if he was honest with himself, he didn't know if that was what he truly wanted. Yes, he'd never stopped loving Pepper, but he'd spent the last six years with Lisa, and he loved her too. He was a mess, a colossal fuck up and a cheater. He didn't deserve either woman and the thought depressed him. The weather had a little sympathy for him; it had barely stopped raining since Pepper had left. It reflected his mood.<p>

Sunday night came and Tony packed up and drove back to the airport to pick Lisa up, smiling widely when she came through the arrivals gate and hugging her close. He took her bag as they made their way back to the car, Tony laughing at the stories she was telling about the girls' weekend together.

"Sounds like fun." He said when she finally let him get a word in edgewise. "Bit of a bust for me, all my horses lost, I should have come to Vegas." He joked, pulling into their driveway.

"Yeah, maybe you should have." Lisa said, smiling strangely at him and getting out of the car. Tony blinked but shrugged it off, getting out of the car as well and following her into the house. Lisa had grabbed her bag out of the car and immediately headed up the stairs once inside the house. Tony followed, treading cautiously, sensing her mood had changed slightly.

"Babe, you okay?" he asked, watching as she dumped her dirty laundry in the hamper and took out her toiletry bag, tossed it up in her hand and then promptly turned and threw it at him, aiming for his head. Tony ducked quickly. "Lisa, what the hell?!"

"Where were you this weekend?" she asked, eerily calm considering she'd just thrown a bag full of makeup and shampoo bottles at him.

"I was…I was with the boys!" Tony protested, breathing heavily.

"Really?" she asked, reaching into her pocket and pressing a few buttons before speaking again. "'Hey Lisa, sorry I couldn't make it tonight, have fun without me while I'm spewing my guts out. Sounds like there's something going around, Danny said Tony cancelled his party, hope he feels better soon.'" She tossed her phone onto the bed and stared at him. "Either you were playing a prank on Danny, or you were someplace else when you should have been having a bachelor party, so which was it?"

Tony stayed silent, eyes wide as he gazed back at Lisa. She took a deep breath and wiped a tear that had made a bid for freedom. "Were you with another woman?" she asked, her voice wavering slightly. Tony eventually nodded, lowering his gaze. "Was it Pepper?" she asked, getting her answer from Tony's flinch at her name. "Oh my God." She whispered, shaking her head and sitting on the end of the bed as her knees buckled. Tony stayed standing, the shame growing with every second.

"It's over." He said eventually, trying to say something to fix it. "It's…I know that doesn't change anything, and I'm so sorry I did this, but it's done." He blinked back tears and swallowed…but even as he said the words, he didn't know why he was sorry or which woman he was crying for.

Lisa had composed herself somewhat, the tears had gone, and she looked back up at him. "Come sit down." She said softly, waiting until he'd done so and sat next to her to continue. "This wedding cost a lot of money, Tony." She said. "My parents have flown in every relative they know, my dress cost more than what I paid for college." She reached over for his hand and linked their fingers. "Do you still love me?"

"Yes." Tony said immediately, a knee jerk reaction to a question he'd been asked a hundred times. But was he answering truthfully, or was it habit?

"Do you still want to marry me?"

A brand new question, and for the first time since Pepper had come back into his life, Tony actually thought about the answer.

* * *

><p>It hadn't stopped raining for more than ten minutes sine Pepper had gotten home, but she preferred it that way. All she wanted to do was to snuggle up on the couch in her pyjamas and watch dumb movies with a huge tub of full fat ice cream. That's all she wanted to do, and that's all she did. She hadn't thought about Tony for a second. Okay, maybe for a second. Or more. Maybe an hour. The entire time she'd been back. The movie was just background noise and the ice cream had melted.<p>

She sighed in frustration, heading into the kitchen to throw the soupy mess that once was delicious ice cream into the trash and making herself a hot chocolate instead. She'd just sat down when there was a hard, persistent knock at the door. It paused for a second before starting again, even more urgently. Pepper quickly got up and peered through the spyhole, sighing heavily when she saw who it was and contemplating opening the door.

"What do you want, Tony?" she asked, hand on the doorknob.

"Pepper? Open the door." Tony called over the noise of the rain. He was soaked through, standing in just his polo shirt and jeans as the rain pounded down on him. "Please? Pepper, please open the door, I need to talk to you."

"There's nothing more to say!" Pepper cried, exasperated.

Tony slammed his fist into the door, making Pepper jump. "There's everything to say!" he yelled. "You don't even realise, do you?" he ran his fingers through his dripping wet hair, smoothing it back. "The first time I kissed you; one kiss and I was hooked. Addicted to you. I have completely fallen for you. Everything you do, everything you say, everything you are. You're my first thought in the morning, the last one before I sleep and pretty much every thought in between. I could never love anyone the way I love you. I'd follow you across the damn universe, Pepper, and I know I fucked things up, probably beyond repair, and you have every right to tell me to go to hell, but I'm standing here in a damn monsoon and I'm asking you to give me a chance."

Pepper rested her forehead against the door and thought hard, but eventually she opened the door, eyes already brimming with tears. "You've got two minutes, Tony, and this will be the last conversation we have, so you better make it a good one."

Tony stepped closer so he didn't have to shout over the rain, panting heavily and locking his gaze with Pepper. "I'm not marrying Lisa." He said. "I can't. I should have called it off so long ago, and I'll regret it for the rest of my life, putting you through all this." He reached out and took her hand, staring down at their joined fingers. "I messed up. I really messed up, and I have no right to ask you to forgive me, but I really need you to be the bigger person here because if I have to walk away from you, it'll kill me." His eyebrows furrowed as he fought back tears but he raised his head, smiling sadly. "Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was out of my control, and I've loved you since the very first time I laid eyes on you, Pepper, and I'll keep loving you long after you get sick of me. You're the only person that can make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time." He raised her hand to his mouth and kissed her fingers softly, pleading with his eyes for her to listen. "And I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you'll let me."

Pepper listened to what he had to say, really listened. She didn't know if she could ever trust him again, and she knew she was being stupid even just listening to him, but everything he'd said was what she felt too. She'd never really stopped loving him, it was the reason she'd let herself be involved in an affair, and she knew that if she didn't give him this chance, she'd regret it. She paused for a moment, chewing her lip, before throwing herself at him, kissing him soundly and wrapping her arms around his neck. Tony, stunned, nearly fell over, expecting anything but this, but managed to catch her before she sent them both tumbling to the ground. He kissed her back, sliding one hand into her hair which was now as damp as his because of the rain, and pulled back to look at her.

"It's you and me, Potts." He said softly, gazing into her eyes. "Always will be."

Pepper smiled at him and kissed him again, nodding happily. They'd finally gotten each other back.


End file.
